Tag Archives: mother
My oldest girl
It is strange and terrible to be here again. I’d let Latte off lead and she made it halfway up the stairs before her legs gave out and she toppled. It wouldn’t be the last time. She seems, at 13.5 years old, to have failing … Read more
Mod
“I have no patience for behavior mod,” I say.
“Then you’re lucky,” she says, “that your wife does it for a living.”
I am. I am lucky. Last night, Mary and Gavin were making a cape and cosmic suit for his fennec fox. G wanted … Read more
Mothering
I was thinking this morning about the evolution of the mother figure in my novels. In Red Audrey, the mother has mental health issues and ultimately commits suicide when Jane is a child. In Field Guide, the mothers run the gamut from cruelty to tenderness, … Read more
Posted in Writing
Tagged adventure, art, artist, boundaries, brokenness, character, control, father, field guide, giraffe people, grace, grief, heart, heartbreak, injury, joy, love, may sarton, memory, mindfulness, mother, power, red audrey, relationships, savor, self, shame, simple, story, women, Writing
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Grace with boundaries
It is the work of my adult life to distinguish between being nice and being kind. I have an obligation to be kind. To treat humans, animals, the earth, etc. with kindness. I am an advocate of grace, which is to say, applied compassion. I … Read more
Posted in Writing
Tagged boundaries, brokenness, character, control, grace, heart, heartbreak, injury, joy, kid, lesbian, love, memory, mother, Nice-Guy Myth, power, queer, relationships, safe, savor, self, shame, simple, story, women, Writing
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Be better than your culture
Mary and I were talking yesterday about how difficult it is to raise boys in this culture, and I argued it’s difficult to raise anyone. We have to raise boys, now, to be better than the people around them. We have to teach them kindness … Read more
Posted in Writing
Tagged art, boundaries, brokenness, character, control, gender politics, grace, grief, heart, heartbreak, injury, joy, kid, love, mary, memory, mindfulness, mother, power, self, women, Writing
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Rehearse this
My kid is testing empathy. And it’s an odd and sometimes discouraging process, as his mother, to see him choose to be funny edged with mean. Quick-witted people have to learn to filter, and that can be difficult when others respond positively to barbed humor. … Read more
Posted in Writing
Tagged boundaries, brokenness, character, check your privilege, control, grace, grief, heart, heartbreak, injury, joy, kid, love, memory, mindfulness, mother, power, queer, relationships, safe, savor, self, shame, simple, story, women, Writing
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It only hurts when I breathe
How do we recover, do you think? Do we recover by writing? By telling our story? Do we recover from the slow, steady work of tackling it, and sitting beside it, and swimming with it? Do we take it to pieces and scatter the pieces? … Read more
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Tagged boundaries, brokenness, character, control, grace, grief, heart, heartbreak, injury, kid, love, mary, mindfulness, mother, power, ptsd, relationships, safe, savor, self, simple, story, women, Writing
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Data
In the 1950s, a scientist began a primate lab, and when infants were born, they were immediately removed from their mothers and put into diapers, for sanitary reasons. The researchers couldn’t understand why the babies clung to the diapers. It was understood then, of course, … Read more
More apparent
I dreamed I had my dog in my arms and was crossing an angry river. Kali wasn’t moving. And I should have been scared — the water above my breasts — but she wasn’t heavy and I wasn’t cold. Still, I woke up crying.
I … Read more
Posted in Writing
Tagged brokenness, grace, grief, heart, heartbreak, hedgehog, injury, jack gilbert, kali, mary, memory, Michiko, mindfulness, mother, poem, relationships, safe, self, story, women, Writing
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Yours
“Hey, Jill,” he says, “I know what your favorite thing in the world is.”
“What is it?”
“Me,” he says with all the certainty of certainty.
“You are so right,” I say.
I don’t understand why we would push away from one another. Why we … Read more
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Tagged adventure, Amanda Palmer, art, Bed Song, boundaries, brokenness, character, control, grace, granny, grief, heart, heartbreak, injury, joy, kid, love, memory, mindfulness, mink cowboy, mother, relationships, safe, savor, story, women, Writing
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