Category Archives: Writing
Opium dreams
I had codeine dreams last night. You know, where you’re in your own house and a couple of dudes are fixing the furnace with scuba equipment and you walk upstairs and say, “Jesus! We have a bathtub! I can’t believe it. I have to tell… Read more
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Tagged brokenness, control, floating vagina, grace, injury, joy, kid, love, mary, masochism, memory, mindfulness, mother, power, relationships, safe, self, shame, story, women, Writing
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Don’t be sore
She realized I was afraid before I realized it. I’ve been stalling and stalling about going to the doctor. I gave my last doctor up and hadn’t settled on a new one, and it seemed perfectly legit not to bother actually looking for a new… Read more
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Tagged boundaries, breasts, grief, heart, injury, it's a good life if you don't weaken, love, mary, mindfulness, mother, power, relationships, safe, savor, self, shame, story, women, Writing
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Courage?
He is explaining to me that courage means not being afraid.
“That isn’t true. Courage is being afraid and acting anyway.”
And then we’re reading Coraline, and she tells the cat a story about her father. They were walking a trail and her father told… Read more
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Tagged boundaries, character, coraline, grace, grief, kid, love, memory, mother, mrs frisby, poland, power, relationships, safe, self, story, women, Writing
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My dear fellow, I haven’t cheated this entire relationship
We were discussing cheating, the way you do at dinner parties. “What is cheating? If you don’t have sex, have you cheated?” “Which is worse, an emotional affair or a casual hook up?” “Who cheats more, men or women?” And then Mary said, “It’s hard… Read more
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Tagged boundaries, brokenness, character, cheating, control, grace, grief, heart, heartbreak, injury, lesbian, love, mary, memory, mindfulness, power, relationships, self, shiny, story, women, Writing
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I’d like mine with a side of privilege
Years ago, this guy walked up to me in the bookstore and asked if we had any magazines on bears.
“Sure, in our Nature section.” I started to show him.
“Um, no,” he said. “I mean lifestyle bears.”
And I stopped and looked at him… Read more
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Tagged bliss, boundaries, brokenness, character, christmas, control, father, god, grace, grief, heartbreak, injury, joy, kid, lesbian, lifestyle bears, love, marriage, mary, memory, mindfulness, mother, power, relationships, safe, savor, self, shame, simple, story, women, Writing
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More googly eyes, stat!
I have just re-glued a googly eye. And you never expect to be this person. The one who says, “This wall doesn’t have any of his art on it. And should.” I used to think my parents were insane. You’re keeping the mouse I painted… Read more
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Tagged boundaries, brokenness, control, father, gingerbread, grace, grief, heart, heartbreak, injury, joy, kid, lesbian, love, mary, masochism, memory, mindfulness, mother, power, relationships, safe, savor, self, shame, simple, story, temple body, women, Writing
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The Christmas Episode
I’ve been ill for two months. Sinus. Chest. Sleeplessness. The kind of endless monotony of coughing where I’ve forgotten what came before coughing. It hasn’t felt like Christmas. No snow. An unusually warm autumn. I have had trouble remembering to be grateful. I have had… Read more
Born
How can I explain about the pool? I remember swimming in infancy. Is that possible? I’ve seen the photographs — the delight, the submersion — and maybe that’s what I remember. I’m underwater when tadpole boy swims for me. A breast stroke, some thrashing kicks,… Read more
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Tagged baptism, boundaries, control, father, grace, heart, joy, kid, love, memory, mindfulness, mother, power, relationships, safe, savor, self, simple, story, tadpole boy, women, Writing
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Clit test
Attraction is just attraction, isn’t it? What I mean is, attraction is chemical, not mathematical — so attraction isn’t proof that we’re good for one another. I’d assert that women invest too much in our attraction — particularly if we’re lesbians — but that’s nonsense.… Read more
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Tagged boundaries, brokenness, cat lesbians, control, heart, heartbreak, Journey, kid, lesbian, love, mindfulness, power, relationships, safe, savor, self, simple, story, women, Writing
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